Our highest calling and purpose is to know God and to make Him known; to become more like Jesus and to make disciples who make disciples. Within this ultimate calling, we are all parts of the Christian body…each part with unique gifts, functions, personalities, and experiences. We are all individually fearfully and wonderfully made. We were all created ON purpose FOR purpose. God has created good works for our kids to WALK into.
One of the quickest ways to squash our joy and reaching our God-ordained potential is comparison. When our kids use other people as the benchmark for what they should be and do, they miss out on all that God has created them to be and do.
The devil works hard to get our kids’ minds and heart off of God and one of his favorite weapons is comparison. And comparison results in one of two outcomes…pride when they think they are better than those they are comparing themselves to or shame and discouragement when they think they don’t live up to their idealized version of other people.
Technology, though it has some wonderful benefits, is a comparison magnet. The filtered highlight reels of the world are ever-present. However, when our kids are rooted in God’s truth, God’s abundance, their identity in Him, and running their own race, there is less time or energy for comparison. We can pray that our kids thrive in purpose, rather than being sidelined in comparison.
God, please help ___________________ to glorify You in all (he/she) does. Let (his/her) actions be pleasing to You. Let (him/her) know that (he/she) is fearfully and wonderfully made….that (he/she) was created ON purpose FOR purpose. Help __________________ see the beautiful and purposeful gifts You have given (him/her). Help (him/her) know that (his/her) personality, passions, experiences, circumstances, and even quirks and weaknesses can all be used by You for Your kingdom and glory.
God, please stir in ________________ early on a love for the good works You created for (him/her) to step in. Provide opportunities for ____________________ to grow in the areas of calling and gifting that You have created in (him/her). Give (him/her) a desire to learn. Open doors to explore these areas and give (him/her) the courage to walk through those doors in boldness, knowing that You are the One who is in control. At the same time, God please close doors that need to be closed.
God, help _____________ fan into flame the gifts you have given (him/her). Help (him/her) see the unique calling you have for (his/her) life. Please be (his/her) provision and give (him/her) a boldness to believe in You for the impossible. Help _____________________ to strive for things far outside of (his/her) abilities to rely on You and to get to see Your hand in all things.
God, help __________________ to know that Your path is the one (he/she) needs to be on. To do nothing is to drift. Help _______________ recognize the value of Your perfect path and plans. Help (him/her) be intentional about boundaries and staying on Your path for (his/her) life. And when (he/she) swerves and gets off track, quickly bring (him/her) back to You.
God, please help _________________ fight the comparison battle that is so destructive. Help (him/her) choose to earnestly celebrate others, rather than envy them. Help __________________ to be so rooted in who You are, who (he/she) is, and gratitude that (he/she) can fight the temptation to compare.
God, help __________________ find joy, contentment, and satisfaction on (his/her) journey, rather than anxiety and envy over coveting the journey of others. Help (him/her) know that You are faithful, good, and a God of abundance. Help (him/her) rest in the goodness of Your plans.
Tips for Parents
Take care to note the benefits of your kids’ personalities, passions, and giftings. Encourage them to press into these gifts. Find ways for them to explore things they are passionate about and use them to serve others and glorify God. Help them be intentional about recognizing how the good gifts from God in them can benefit others.
You may consider going out for a special ice-cream date periodically one-on-one with your child and talking about these things. Ask them about areas they are interested in, gifts they feel God has given them, how they have used them to serve, and brainstorming ideas of how they can grow in these gifts and glorify God with them. You can use the card below for starter questions on your "dates". It can be a tool for them to practice taking inventory of the ways they can serve others and glorify God with the things God (and life experiences) have given them.
As they get older and venture into the world of social media, remain very diligent in monitoring and teaching them how to create healthy habits like imposing time restrictions to increase awareness of usage and learning when to take a technology sabbatical whey it impacts their well-being.
God has prepared good works for you to walk in.
For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. Ephesians 2:10
God has good plans for you.
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11
God’s plans will stand.
Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand. Proverbs 19:21
God will fulfill His purpose for you.
The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your steadfast love, O Lord, endures forever. Do not forsake the work of your hands. Psalm 138:8
God works for your good for His purpose for you.
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28.
God has chosen you to bear good fruit.
You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give it to you. John 15:16
God is faithful…He will equip you where He calls you.
He who calls you is faithful; he will surely do it. 1 Thessalonians 5:24
Press on in your calling.
I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:14
God is working in you.
for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure. Philippians 2:13
God desires you to have an abundant life.
The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly. John 10:10
God will help you fulfill your purpose if you seek Him.
I cry out to God Most High, to God who fulfills his purpose for me. Psalm 57:2
Good things take time.
For still the vision awaits its appointed time; it hastens to the end—it will not lie. If it seems slow, wait for it; it will surely come; it will not delay. Habakkuk 2:3
Fan into flame the gifts of God in you.
For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands, for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control. 2 Timothy 1:6-7
Do not neglect the gifts God has given you. Practice them. Immerse yourself in them.
Do not neglect the gift you have, which was given you by prophecy when the council of elders laid their hands on you. Practice these things, immerse yourself in them, so that all may see your progress. 1 Timothy 4:14-15
God’s purposes won’t be thwarted.
I know that you can do all things, and that no purpose of yours can be thwarted. Job 42:2
You are who you are and where you are for a God-ordained purpose.
For if you keep silent at this time, relief and deliverance will rise for the Jews from another place, but you and your father's house will perish. And who knows whether you have not come to the kingdom for such a time as this? Esther 4:14
Examine YOUR OWN work and actions.
But let each one test his own work, and then his reason to boast will be in himself alone and not in his neighbor. For each will have to bear his own load. Galatians 6:4-5
Comparison often leads to jealously, which leads to disorder.
For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice. James 3:16
Diligently do the work given to YOU.
and to aspire to live quietly, and to mind your own affairs, and to work with your hands, as we instructed you, 1 Thessalonians 4:11
Envy rots at the core.
A tranquil heart gives life to the flesh, but envy makes the bones rot. Proverbs 14:30
Jealously is a sign of a life not lived for God, but for the world.
For while there is jealousy and strife among you, are you not of the flesh and behaving only in a human way? 1 Corinthians 3:2
Jealousy is a sign of a love for the world and things of the world.
Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. 1 John 2:15
Look to God – not others – for what is good, acceptable, and perfect.
Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. Romans 12:2
Celebrate others instead of comparing.
Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Philippians 2:3
Seek God’s approval, not the approval of others.
For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ. Galatians 1:10
Trust God for direction, not what others are doing or saying you should do.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. Proverbs 3:5-6
Rather than looking to others, look within to test your faith.
Examine yourselves, to see whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves. 2 Corinthians 13:5